the coin is grey. Because nothing is black and white. Hang on...
stuff IS black and white (b&w) -
everything else which is the important bit because those are the things we most want direction on... or answers to. They are the things we really wish were black and white.
I think that rather than expecting the norm to be 'black and white' - we should expect things to be grey and just be relieved (in terms of having to pros/cons/work it all out) when it's b&w.
We keep thinking there are 'right' answers - which in those b&w cases there might be but it's all the rest that aren't that make your head 'full'... and the challenge there is - there's no 'turn to the back of the book to check your answer'... so how the heck do you know if you got it right anyway? The results?
Well now they might be good/terrible but in 6mths it may turn out to be the best/worst thing you ever did... and then again different in 12mths time...
So it's the 'grey', and on the third side of the coin that are the hardest or most mind-fryingly challenging to make - even when they're relatively small decisions. and then decisions to stick to. and not second-guess.
and then... guess what? there might be more than one 'right' answer AND they might all completely contradict themselves... so again there's this assumption that there is one right answer when there almost probably isn't. Nine times out of ten I reckon there isn't. Those of us who easily find a silver lining will have an easier time in hindsight saying 'yep, that was the right thing to do' but really, it's not about making the 'right' choice at a certain time perhaps, as much as making a choice. An informed choice. After a good night's sleep and to the best of your abilities at that moment.
Hats off to those of you who's brain is never quiet - mine hears yours. Yay for lists and paper I say!