in the wilderness we glow a bright and steady flame but life in the city smothers us.
So I don't go to the 'wilderness' here, I go bush... but my point is, when I go bush, or coastal, or really, just OUT of the city, I actually feel my body breathing out... and my mind too...
There is no 'stuff' blocking the horizon and you can see ALL of the sky (well you can here, coz it's predominantly so flat lol)... and if there are things making themselves known on the horizon, it's trees. Maybe it's the Feng Shui of not having stuff towering over you (buildings, powerpoles etc), maybe it's the fresh(er) air but it's so OPEN and my brain works much much better. Even just getting to the beach (when the beach isn't packed) will do the same, if I can't get truly OUT. The beach when it's not packed, on a stormy day, is fantastic for pondering.
Just a swim in the ocean takes me back to my surfing days and I feel refreshed and alive truly from the inside out. Not that I swim in the ocean that often these days. I don't usually get the opportunity even if we are at the beach, but I did manage it once this summer - a swim for me and oh boy it was bliss (thanks S!).
I need to get out bush, proper bush, once a year, at least. If not that, then at least to the beach or over to the park (where I can lay on the grass, watch the sky and pretend the 'city' stuff doesn't exist).
The bush, the beach, the 'out there' is where I belong. I have my known comfort place of existence (aka 'home') for now in the 'city', I have all the places I know and many people I love here, and I can be happy here and make things work, but I really belong 'out there'.
I crave it
and when I am there it's all I can do to just absorb it all, with all my senses, before it's time to go. Someday hopefully not too far away, 'home' and 'out there' will be the same place.