Precious Angel...

Another family has lost their Baby... a precious, loved and much wanted Bub who had as much right as any to a living place on this earth - who should be here right now, in arms, warm and safe. So unbelievably unfair and just plain wrong... it shouldn't happen. Insane to think that in just a matter of minutes, the life you imagined for your family and your new Baby is just gone. Just like that. One minute life is poldding along fine and your mind is planning and imagining, and the next, it's all gone. Just this deep void of loss replacing it. I was thinking about this as we drove the other day... and wishing so much they never had to know this feeling.

In some ways, it seems like losing Brenna was so long ago, but in other ways it's so very close, it's never far away - especially when you hear of the heartbreak for other families, it 'refreshes' or takes you right back, and everything comes to the surface again ... and when that happens you want to help, so badly (and perhaps this is the purpose of resurfacing emotions, in a practical sense anyway)... you want them to know that the journey eventually will take them to somewhere so different to where they are now... but you can't tell them that because they won't believe it... no one can believe that the grief and heartbreak won't ever be THIS raw as it is now...so overwhelming that you're not even a participant in the world...
You want to help... but in the end this journey is one they must undertake... there are no shortcuts, no 'ways around' only through. You can be there, help practically, be an ear, acknowledge the special place in their heart this Baby holds - all of which of course can make a huge difference TO the journey no matter how small the gesture, word or thought... but you can never 'help' in the sense of hastening the journey itself...
Not a day goes by I don't wish for our Brenna... and now another family knows the heartbreak, just as so many have known it before, in so many different ways. Another precious Baby with Angel Wings.

Whispered kisses to you, Baby James... xo My heart is with your Mum & Dad and family...

Quinn 4 week weigh and measure

Our modem is chucking a wobbly when the weather is warm hence not being online much. Weighed and measured Quinn today. He was just under 4kg born, and weighs over 5kg today (5170g) and was 52.5cm tall and is now 57cm tall all that in 4 weeks. I'll check what that is in pounds... ok so just under 9lb born, is now 11lb 4oz.

Hope you're all well and when our modem gets over itself, I'll catch up with you all! xo